continue on 29/12/05

i love you all...
haha...
you guys really rock my world~~~

think back on yesterday...
still can laugh lah...

read van's blog...
yeah...
everyone's a player...
and everyone's a target right....
just that which target is the right one...
haha...
guess who said that...
.
.
.
well, definitely not me....


Yuan Kan Hen Mei, Jin Kan Xiang Gui.
[Far See Very Pretty, Close See Like Ghost --- direct translation]
(credits to Han, though he wasn't there.)

Chio From Far, Far From Chio.
(credits to Teddy)


really wanna say to Teddy...
haha...
real real real thankz for the present...
hmm...
should i wear it to school?







*wink
.
.
.
wishes upon the stars =P

29th of december 2005

thankz teddy for the surprise present...
haha...
was really shocked...
but haha...
first time received such a special present...
haha...
i think it ws kinda cool lah...
well, thanks your maid...
*wink

=P


real nice feeling to have a heart-to-heart talk...
with Ah Gong, Pui, Teddy, Van...
haha...
hopefully we still can have it again...
Ah Gong...
you will be able to find that very special girl in your life de lo....
haha...
you high standards arh...
but can lah...
slowly find...
haha..
but...
maybe wait for your hair to grow a bit first lah...
opps...
.
.
.
.
.


thank you guys...
=P
happy birthday to everybody...

K-Box

yesterday went out with Leen and Han.
we went to the tampines K-Box.
due to festive season, the price is higher than usual lah.
haiz... kinda expensive.
more over... the person at the counter mentioned that we might have to leave the place at 5pm
cuz someone booked it at 5pm.
so we dont have a choice..
though the usual time period is from 2pm to 7pm.
lol...
so me and Leen was like okay lol... [wat can we do]
.
.
.
.
.
went inside this small room - room 16.
then i started singing first.
Leen arh, she do her homework...
[how can she concentrate lol... haha...]
we were saying that each person sing 5 songs then pass on to the other.
but that around 4.30pm, the person came in and ask us to clear up by 5pm.
lol..
then bill came too...
sianz...
all the mood was spoilt lah...
so we cleared up and packed our howework...
then each person have 2 servings of drinks...
we were like CHIONG-ing lah...
drink finish everything by 5pm..
turned out nobody came in to chase us away...
meaning the person who booked the room haven or maybe didnt come..
haha...
then we CHIONG to sing as many songs as possible...
we sang each song till the chorus then change another song...
MAXIMISE OUR TIME...
haha...
like wat Leen said...
in between the workers were like walking up and down...
we were like "okay, lets pretend we dont see them..."
wat can they do...
we already paid our bill...
then we CHIONG-ed from 4-30pm to 7.00pm
then leave the place...
[though tried to avoid the workers there...]
haha...
but it was fun...




was supposed to go out with Shaun tomolo.
but he gotta work till 4pm.
cuz he say wanna sing K-Box mah...
so i tot maybe 2-7pm...
but i have no money lah...
then he say treat me...
hm...
expensive lol...
.
.
.
then he also wanna to have dinner mah...
then maybe going out with him on Friday instead...
but not comfirm yet...
haha...
maybe go K-Box again...
opps...
we'll see lah....

lame peppermint.

i took out a mint sweet and gave it to my friend that Choon Kai guy lah.

why you like to eat mint sweets arh?

nice to eat mah.

i like to eat pepper leh.

really? [disbelief...]

yeah, i eat every also must add pepper one.

really arh? [....become believed]

so, i like pepper. you like mint. we like peppermint lah.

dots.

haha. lame lol.

凌晨三点钟

I like the last sentence. haha.


张智成 - 凌晨三点钟

OS :这是你离开的第三个星期六
面包我吃了两口　啤酒还剩半手
香烟我还是一包接一包地抽
你搬走了以后 我还会常常在你住的公寓底下
等你下楼

现在是凌晨三点钟　喝了点酒头有点痛
寂寞的烟点燃空虚的夜　暂时把心放空

你晾的床单忘了收　没烫的衬衫有点皱
明天开始我将如何面对　没有你的以后

那些美好的画面反复在播送
但心破碎了之后　要怎么去拼凑

Baby Baby Love can be so beautiful
只怪那一刻　话说得太重
所有的情节都失控

Baby Baby Love should be so beautiful
你给的太多　现在我才懂
只有烟和酒陪伴的　凌晨三点钟

(RAP)现在是凌晨三点钟 喝了点酒头有点痛
你晾的床单忘了收 没烫的衬衫有点皱
明天开始我将如何面对 没有你的以后

凌乱的房间里头还留著你的香味
怎么也戒不掉你独特的笑容
如果时钟倒著走　我不会再让你走
有些事情要绝望到底才能看得透

没那么爱他

i like the lyrics of this song...

范玮琪 - 没那么爱他

你有权利情绪化
你不一定要坚强
便有些事情不能伪装
别为自己设了框

我懂失去的悲伤
也懂进退的挣扎
但想过去 都是失望
又何必要放不下

是习惯 还是爱
不放心 还不甘心
只有你知道解答

其实你有那么爱他
真的不需要那么想他
编织过的梦想
自己也可以抵达
谁说一定要有他
其实你有没有那爱他
没有深陷到不可自拔
认清了真心话
你就放得下

深呼吸 抬头望
发现天空很空广
这世界 那么大
幸福总会在某个地方

其实没有那么爱他
真的不需要那么想他
拥有过的计划
留给值得的对象
你知道 不会是他

hmm.... wat title leh?

yesterday... was like only 2 hours ago..
haha...

kinda shocked when Choon Kai called my home yesterday...
cuz he was using his house phone and i dont have his house number....
then picked up the phone... it was him...
hmmm....
why he call leh?
.
.
.
.
.


ask me whether i finished my homework...
SO THat he can copy lah...
haha...
a typical 1S29 guy...
i mean 2S29....

then we talked on the phone for quite sometime...
about this and that lah...
[dont wanna tell you the details leh =P]
haha...
didnt know a lot of things till he told me...
hmmm....

then we supposed to meet each other at Singapore Post Centre at 3pm...
[didnt know that the Paya Lebar shopping mall-look alike is called Singapore Post Centre until he tell me... haha...]
i tot i was late...
turned out he was later then me lah...
haha...
a typical 2S29 guy again...


then we went to Coffee Bean...
and sat down...
he asked me whether wanna get a drink and so i looked around...
I TELL YOU...
I saw this ad-poster with PEPPERMINT printed on it...
its this peppermint (ice-blended - vanilla or mocha thingy)
really wanna bring home sia...
so tempting....
haiz....

and then i was pronoucing MOCHA as Mo-Cha lah...
though its supposed to be Mo-Ka...
haha...
if Mocha is pronouced as Mo-Ka, then what about Bo Bo Cha Cha?
haha...
Just For Laugh...

then let him copy my work...
and i do my own stuffs...

the place is damn cold...
freezing cold lol... but didnt bring jacket...
so...
freeze there lol...

packed up at 7pm...
then went to foodcourt and eat...
he chose a Korean store lah...
and the noodle he bought is just like a typical instant noodle...
he bought it cuz you know what...
cuz its the cheapest thing there lah...
$2.90...
haha...
then i chose to buy the fried wanton mee...
i tell you...
the fried wanton is BIGGER than and Can COVER the bowl of mee....
haha...
super big wanton...
but its nice to eat...
yeah...

then finish eating...
waited for him to copy finish the Halogen Compound notes...
then go home lo...

highlights

highlights on 24 dec:

met this primary school friend at This Fashion...
she is so cute.... forever that face....
know her through Chinese Speech and Drama Club...
and she's one year younger than us lah...
haha...
talked to her for quite some time...
then Zuo Han joined in after he came back from the toilet....
he was like guessing how we know each other...
haha....
talked talked talked....
real nice feeling....
but she's looking kinda sad cuz of something....
hope she'll be fine soon...
o levels' jia you oh...
haha...
Zuo Han surely laugh when he read this lah....
console people... i also need people to console...
haha....


tried on this Super MINI Skirt at Fox Women....
Puty was like "WooHoo... Whee-u-Wheet"
haha...
thankz...
i'll take that as a Compliment....
when Van saw it.. she was like...

@_@


[silent...]

.
.
.
.
.



haha....



highlights on 25 dec:

me and puty spent around 1 hour plus just to look for a shop call Pure M.I.L.K at Plaza Sing.
1 HOUR 10 MINS...
bet ya cant beat that record...
haha...
we toot toot....
when we walked into Plaza Sing and walked around that level... basement 1
should have been able to find it....
but we chose to look around level 1-4
and walked up and down, up and down.....
phew...
luckily decided to walk the basement...
if not... the Guinness World Record Book will have puty and my name inside...
*Ladies Breaking the World Record for using _hours just to find a clothing shop*
........


we walked into the Royal Sporting House [i think],
and look at shoes...
woohoo...
there's like this cute guy who's working there lah...
puty was like "Chun, turn there and look at that guy."
and so... I didnt...
too shy to look...
haha....
but got another chance, "Okay, now look at the guy at the counter."
Okay....
charming...
haha...
tan, tall, slim...
[erm... slim izzit a word used to describe guys right.... sorry]
tan, tall, handsome, cute, stylish?....
blah blah blah...
i was like, "Puty, can we buy something and ask that guy to serve us, huh?"
haha...
but didnt lah....
so sad....
sob sobz...


saw this thingy... dunnoe whether should buy it or not...
but didnt in the end....
haiz....
see if got another chance to go there and buy lol....
leave it to fate...
haha...

shopping

what i bought on 24 dec:


a brown top


which i had to go through...
erm... obstacles to get it...

special thankz to....
the following people who helped me get it at $29 instead of $34.90
or should i say SAVED ME from the scary auntie....
[felt like crying when the auntie was so desperately asking me to buy it at high price luckily han was like helped me talked back to the auntie... then she kept quiet.... phew...]

Zuo Han (for the 1st round of bargaining or should i say arguing.. haha)
Tuty (for blocking the auntie away from me)
Vanessa (for the 2nd round of bargaining)
Serene (for the 3rd round of bargaining)

thankz a lot...
haha.... well its just to DRAMATIC to write it out...
I'll just have to ACT it out for ya...
some other day....




what i bought on 25 dec:


a Samuel and Kevin 3/4 pants
a Pure M.I.L.K polo tee
a Pure M.I.L.K green skirt


special thankz to...

Tuty [for accompanying me]
Vanessa [for sort-of advertising the 30% discount Pure M.I.L.K is having the day before]
Jason [for giving me the discount for the S&K pants]


haha....
anyways...
i really like all the stuffs i bought....
yeah...
thankz people...

muackyz....

=P


btw thankz puty for saying that I give you the model feeling...
MUAHAHAHAHA...
i'll take it as a Compliment.....
[is that being B.I.T.C.H.Y?]
haha... Bird also said that before....
haha....
hmm... wonder how's he....

you guys rockz

haha..
leen, han, van and me...
we're so funny... or should i say cute...
haha...

bet ya think that after the christmas so-called countdown and drinking at starbucks, the four of us will go home...
[cuz stef, teddy, fred left earlier on..]
haha...NOPE..
we just sat there and talked...
even had a small bite of starbucks whats-that-sandwich-called ? erm dunnoe...
anyways...
and a short chat with the guy whom Zuo Han tot was the manager.
we tot he looked young. [to be a manager lah]
turned out HE'S NOT...
opps...
haha...
HE IS ONLY 17.
same year as us..
and he asked Zuo Han, whether he know who is Cheryl?
I was like Cheryl wat?
Cheryl Chan?
Izzit Cheryl Chan Xing Ru? (forgot how to spell her name - its in HanYuPinYin)
Yeah, you know her arh? She's my secondary school classmate.
Oh, she's my primary school mate.
Hahaha.
Yup, a short chat lol...

after eating finished the sandwich, we left the place.
but decided to stay outside the starbucks area and talk.
we talked about JC friends, L.G.V.E, blah blah blah...
but kena chased away by the uncle-cleaner...

van and leen was like I wanna use the loo...
[forgot what happened in between liao]
we saw one of the TM side door is open, so we just went in.
they all walked so fast, I was like "oei, don't leave me behind leh... i dont wanna walk the last"
[cuz that time was like 1 plus lah.... freaky...]

as we walked along the shops to go to the toilet at the 1st floor.
han was like "dont anyhow look into the shops, later you see eyes...blah blah"
van seems so excited to me, haha....
she went on talking about this and that, which freaks us out...
haha....
reached the toilet but turned out the cleaner was cleaning it.
so we took the lift and up we go to the 2nd floor.
2nd floor's toilet was freaking scary lah...
super eeeeeeeee....
cuz its very drak there....
though leen and van went in but...
we decided to try the 4th floor - cinema level mah... shouldnt be too dark.
took the lift again, han was trying to scare us lah...
he was holding this bunch of balloons and trying to do something funny...
just nice the lift door open...
[shocked]
so many eyes looked inside...
so many people standing outside lah....
damn pai seh....
hahaha....
we quickly walked out and go to the toilet....
but still its very quiet and eeee....
hai yo... decided to go back to the 1st floor...
dont care lah... got cleaner... at least there is the washing or vacuuming sound....
took and lift again and back to the 1st floor...
finally, leen and van used the handicapped toilet at the corner....
quickly and quietly go in and come out...
haha...
cuz scared that the cleaner will scold...
phew...
the crisis is over....
then we walked out of TM lo...

was thinking where can we go and find a place to sit down....
hmmm... decided to try han's....
okay... walked there but then every table and chair is locked...
so decided to go to the CPF building nearby-Mac.. 24 hours.... and they HAVE TOILET...
so much about the scary adventure at TM toilets... dots..
haha...

when we reached there, its already 2.10am
okay... we talk until 2.45am then go okay?
haha.. thats what we said..
turned out...
from 2.10am to 2.45am...
from 2.45am to 3.30am....
from 3.30am to 4.00am...
hai ya.. might as well talk until the first bus come... now take cab not worth it liao...
guess who said that...
haha....
......................................

erm.. its me lah...





we talked about secondary school days, jc life, friends,..... a lot..... cant finish everything...
but was too tired to continue...
haha...
when we went to the Mac it was so crowded....
then the crowded slowly go off...
the table beside ours had like two couples came and ate and go...
haha...
we're the survivors.....
guess what... leen was holding the balloons through out our conversation....
haha....
train her arm muscles....
but it was really nice....
haha... cool lol...
and we took some photos using leen and van's phone...
all of us wore leen's red specs and take pics...
leen was like "hey my specs look good on everyone... cool.."
haha...
suddenly it rained at around five....
opps... how to go home...
well... leen's daddy called and said that he's coming to send us home...
thankz a lot.... :P
before we leave....
we saw this group of people walking into Mac...
and Justin was there...
my gosh... his hair is like....
one patch one patch red red de....
erm... no comments....
we were like crazy lah....
three girls used the bunch of balloons to block us form being seen....
haha... [btw han was sleeping happily then...]
we shift the balloons up and down, up and down....
craziness....
haha.... he like saw us and waved a bit...
but we didnt wave back...
then he went toilet....
so we decided that..."okay we use the balloons to block us first, when he come out right, we bring up the balloons, then say hi to him..."
and so we did that...
haha...
stupid lah.... but it was fun...

then leen's daddy came...
so we were all sent home safely....
during the journey home, we were like talking so happily...
haha...
nice feeling....

reached home around 6.00am...
[recalled that i called my brother earlier on to inform him that i'll be back late...
turned out i reached home "early"....]
haha....
opps...
bad girl....
haha... sorry mummy.... >_<

anyways... really enjoyed the crazy, cool, fun, scary, whatever you call it.... gathering...
haha...
can we have it next year again?
*winkz...

=P okay?
till then... jia you people...

haiz-yoz

was thinking no RAIN's concert nevermind
[sob sobz at the background]

but then wanna hint the person to buy me a school bag.
cuz my school bag is like having bits ad pieces dropping off everyday.

but then found out that TEDDY is buying me / or should I say he ALREADY bought me a present lah...
hai yoz...
no point hinting liao...
haha...
there goes my school bag for a next start....
=]]


anyways, merry christmas to those who celebrate it.
and happy birthday to pui's 17th birth...

birthday present

er.. hmmm...
hint hint hint hint....
someone's birthday coming soon...
this message is for the persent who is buying me present...
[i dont know who's buying]

can you buy me a ticket to Taiwan?
please. @_@

haha... i wanna go to RAIN'S concert. [its on 29 - 30 Dec]
sob sobz....
rain rain ~~~

haha.. same as my email....
i_like_RAINy_daze@hotmail.com

can?
can?
can?
whom ever you are?

~_~

nightmare

had this damn freaking weird and scary dream...
tell if you know what it means...
haha...
but don't really remember what has happened...


dreamt about a monkey, a family....
I think I was also involved too...
all of us like kena chased by people... [as in really chased and those people wanna kill you]
my gosh...
this dream is very bloodly...
erm...
i remember the monkey has one of its hand chopped off and thrown somewhere...
and all of us wanna run away from those people...
and blah blah... [don't really remember the dream]
i think i dreamt of ghost too...
eeee....
but its really super duper horrible dream...

sorry arh

haha.
wrong information about the classic.
its tonight...
my gosh...
I'm so toot toot...
sorry haha.
wonder if anyone actually read that message and waited at that time for the movie to start.

>_<

the classic

my gosh~~
channel U's gonna telecast that movie...
yeah~~~
THE CLASSIC...

i tell you...
you guys better get ya butts stick to the sofa...
because it is definitely worth watching...
especially for the girls..
i really cried when i watched the movie...
SUPER NICE NICE NICE NICE NICE~~~
I give it a 10 out of 5.
[erm... a bit... dots...]
anyways, i really love the movie a lot.
watched twice le.. but still wanna watch again.

Tomolo night at 11.30pm
[i think so] *_*


go and watch k....

epilepsy

was just curious how epilepsy is caused.
went to search for the website to check it out...

For Your Information:

Is there a cure for epilepsy?

There is no cure for epilepsy yet but there are many treatments available to reduce the frequency & severity of seizures. Brain surgery is a possible further consideration in certain situations when medication do not adequately control seizures.

[so there's no possibility that it will just end like that lah? hmmm...]

** Epilepsy can affect anyone at any time and any age.


Found This Kinda Shocking Information To Me:

Driving

In Singapore, under the current road Traffic Act, people with epilepsy are prohibited to drive any type of vehicles, regardless of whether they have been seizure free for 2 or more years. Such people must declare their epilepsy condition when applying for a driving license. Once declared, application will automatically be rejected. For those who have already obtained their driving licenses, it is their duty to inform the authorities should they develop epilepsy subsequently.

In 1997, the Singapore Medical Association prepared medical guidelines for medical practitioners in Singapore to assist them in advising and certifying their patients with regards to fitness to drive.

The guidelines recommended that people with epilepsy may be allowed to drive a private vehicle if a person has:

no structural brain lesion
normal EEG
been seizure free for 3 years and off all anti-epileptic drugs for at least 1 year.

For those who have seizures only during sleep, the minimal seizure free period is 2 years whilst for those who wants to drive public vehicle, the minimal seizure free period is 10 years. However, the guidelines recommended have not been implemented as the Road Traffic Act has yet to be amended.

[which means as long as you have or had epilepsy --- you cannot drive lah ~ the~~~

dots.. just make it straight lah...]

read some of the personal account of people living with epilepsy.
think I might wanna join an organisation and help those epileptics one day.
but the stuffs I know about epilepsy are so little.
haiz.

really sick le lah

luckily don't really have a flu now...
last night - my flu transformed to blocked nose...
sianz...
but cough cough cough non-stop...
hmm... maybe i have contracted pneumonia...
kidding lah...
but it would be cool to get hospitalized right?
haven't try before...

mummy ask me to see a doctor...
but i just ignore her...
[bad bad]...
no lah... cuz i think its a waste of money lo.
haiz...
doctor look at me, i look at her.
then *PoP...
here's the cough syrup...
there goes the money [for using their air-con, wasting their salivas, and using energy to type out our names and stick on the bottle]...
haiyo...
Just let it cough lo...

talking about yesterday...
I decided try not to listen to those sad songs...
scared they make me a saddist...
so i turned on my mini M1 [free gift] radio (it's kinda cute though)
then.. so happened
the whole night...
all the songs that they played are inside my cds...
-_______________-"
sad sad sad....
how worse the sianz-ness can it be....
lol...
don't know whether to laugh or to cry...
haha...

sick soon

haiz.
feeling sick nowadays.
every morning I wake up, I can feel that my throat sore, and puffy eyes.
:((
don't want sia.
now having cough cough, and flu.

~~~

sick sick go away...
don't come again another day....

like we never loved at all

vann sent me this...
i think the lyrics are just what i'm feeling about and thinking of.

Faith Hill - Like We Never Loved At All

You never looked so good
As you did last night
Underneath those city lights
There walking with your friend
Laughing at the moon
I swear you looked right through me
But i'm still living with your goodbye
And you're just going on with your life

[chorus]
How can you just walk on by
Without one tear in your eye
Don't you have the slightest feelings left for me
Maybe that's just your way
Of dealing with the pain
Forgetting everything between our rise and fall
Like we never loved at all

You, i hear you're doing fine
Seems like you're doing well
As far as i can tell
Time is leaving us behind
Another week has passed
And still i haven't laughed yet
So tell me what your secret is
To letting go like you did, like you did

[chorus]

Did you forget the magic
Did you forget the passion
Did you ever miss me
Ever long to kiss me

[chorus]

You, you never looked so good

one last

Taufik Batisah - One Last

I never could imagine, life without you
From the moment you walked into my world
Never knew how long a loving flame could burn
But losing you has forced me to learn
That we can't change the way we feel inside
And every try at love never turns out right
We both know it's better if we just let it go
So let's have

Chorus:
One last kiss
One last touch
One last tender moment between us
One last dance
To our first song
While pretending there's nothing wrong
Let's stay here for awhile and
Cherish every moment we're in denial
We both know
Its better if we just let it go

Everytime I try to take a stand at all
I see your face again and I fall
In the middle of the night there's the scent of a rose
The smell of your perfume I suppose
But we can't change the way we feel inside
And every try at love never turns out right
We both know it's better if we just let it go
So let's have

Chorus

Baby if we met each other under a different sky
Maybe then things would be much better between you and I
We could always hold on to this one special thing we share
But it would be too much for us to bear
So let's have

Chorus

We both know
It's better if we just let it go



I don't know.... how to let go...

fallen

Don't really know what's the story behind this song.
But I think it sounds nice.

Sarah McLachlan - Fallen

Heaven bent to take my hand
And lead me through the fire
Be the long awaited answer
to a long and painful fight
Truth be told I've tried my best
but somewhere along the way
I got caught up in all there was to offer
and the cost was so much more than I could bear

Chorus:
Though i've tried, I've fallen..
I have sunk so low
I have messed up
better I should know
So don't come round here
and tell me i told you so....

We all begin with good intent
Love was raw and young
We believed that we could change ourselves
The past could be undone
But we carry on our backs the burden
Time always reveals
The lonely light of morning
the wound that would not heal
it's the bitter taste of losing everything
that i have held so dear.

Chorus

Heaven bent to take my hand
nowhere left to turn
I'm lost to those i thought were friends
to everyone i know
Oh they turned their heads embarassed
pretend that they don't see
but it's one missed step
you'll slip before you know it
and there doesn't seem a way to be redeemed

Chorus

useless...not

Puty, think you won't be able to guess.
Haha.
Just now, after reaching home.
I went inside my room and cried again.
Haiz.
Have been so useless for one month plus le.
Gonna make myself useful while crying.

Next time, when I cry right, put a pail in front of me.
Then like that can collect water.
Save money sia.

dream

I had this dream a few days ago.



I was sitting on the bus.
Then suddenly, he came and sat beside me.
We were talking happily.
When I turned my head away to look at the scenery outside the window, he put his arm around my shoulder.
I was so shocked that I turned back and looked at him.
He said, "Let's be together again."
I was so happy that I hugged him and cried.



But I know it won't happen.
Never will.

depression

Down on depression mood again.
Haiz.
Don't like sia.
Everyday feel like someone owe me money like that.
[Imagine that kinda face]
Lol.

Came back from tuition, made me realized something.
Haiz.
Nothing has changed.
I'm still the same.
Standing on the same old spot.
Never moved.
Haiz.
Slap me lah.
Still as useless as ever.
All I know is to cry.
Sit on the bus also can cry.
Sianz.

I hope that someone can save me soon.
Before all my energy is drained.

birthday list

My Birthday List:

1) A yummy yummy dinner with my family
2) A small cake
(there's no peppermint cake available arh?) :(
3) Buy myself a cute cute cute 2006 diary ---- for a brand new start
4) No crying on that day


Gotta go and find whether there is pepperminty cake.
yum yum~~ peppermint -__________- My Favouritey.
Hopefully can cancel everything. Haha.

Guys, if wanna get me a present, can get me something practical. Haha.
I not Ke Qi wan.
Muahahaha.

quiz 5

can you believe this?
I'm so gonna faint.


Jeans and Personality

Basic Jeans

If you like to wear your basic blue jeans, not tight, baggy, decorated or whatever, you are content with your current status and life style. You normally wear jeans only when it's appropriate to do so. Sounds like a real gentleman or lady doesn't it?

quiz 4

okay this quiz is funny.
or at least I think so.

they asked --- Whats the favorite place in your home?

my answer was --- Bedroom.

Here is the analysis:

You are imaginative and colorful. You attract people just by the way you talk. This can make some people feel jealous.

Woah. I didn't even know that.

quiz 3

Bright and Cheerful

You are always cheerful and charming. You never get too serious with people when they're around, but when you are alone, you think carefully about what they have said. That's because you don't want anyone to see you being too somber. Your personality means you have a lot of friends and you are often the center of attention. Many people who fall into this category become artists and movie stars, perhaps fame could be yours in the future as well.


haha. "fame could be yours in the future"
Come on, people, queue up and get my autograph please.

quiz 2

You desire a love that will last forever. You are quite serious about finding this type of love, and that's why you think carefully about the men that you meet before deciding whether you could really love them. You don't just develop a crush on someone overnight: you look at a person's personality and other aspects of their life before deciding to form an attachment. If a guy doesn't meet your expectations, you would rather be alone. Your love has to be perfect. Be careful though, you could be missing out on some worthy relationships because your standards are so high.


My standards really that high meh? Don't think so lol. Haha.

quiz 1

Your view on yourself:
You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You have many goals and want to achieve as much as you can. The jobs you enjoy are those that let you burn off your considerable excess energy.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.


I don't know if all are true. I guess some are correct.

p.h.o.t.o.s 02

HAHAHA.
Bet ya laugh.
It's my brother acting cool here.





















My father gave me this Zouk Out - Access All Areas card.
Cool huh.















Hehe. Its me when I'm erm... primary 4?
Zuo Han, the guy wearing school uniform is Joseph from your class, you know?
Oh, Jocelyn was sitting beside me.
With the make-up on our cute little faces.















Here's our lastest 6C gathering neo-print.
Too bad, Felicia wasn't inside.
Cannot show you guys, her pretty face.
Go figure out, who's who k.
[Names available are:
Adeline, Mindy, Kassyn, Chun Yan, Yi Xin, Nicholas, Kenneth, Wen Hao]
















This photo is taken by ME.
It's taken at night when we were in school waiting for our parents to come out.
I forgot why we have to go there le.
But back then, we were primary 5 or 6 ba.
The bus at the back was our school bus.
Guess who this person is, he is our Mr. Kenneth.
The 183cm guy. Haha.


















This is Mr Nicholas.
Same time and place taken as the photo above.

This is none other than --- Miss Small Chunzy.

Haha.

But hey, I have double eyelid k.

This is Miss Baby Chunzy. :P

Cute right? I know lah.

Opps... forgot to tell ya that if you click on the pictures, they will show you a bigger version, ya know, ya know?

i thought...

I thought I became stronger, because I haven't cried for the past 2 weeks.
But after the outing, I really couldn't take it again.
Haiz, stupid me.
Shouldn't have agreed to go in the first place.
I don't think I'm going to go the next time.

Didn't mean talk to him using some harsh tones, or sarcastic remarks.
Because I know I was going to cry any moment.
Jus trying to make myself feel better.
I also don't know what was I angry about.
Haiz.

Never in my life, I really hope to go back to school so quickly.
Because I know that when I'm in school, I'm always the one who laugh the most.
Because there's Esther to partner with me, and both of us will tell all the dirty jokes.
And everyone else will laugh along.
Haha.

Yesterday, I cried myself to sleep, listening to S.H.E's new song - Tian Hui.
I really think that song is very nice, especially the lyrics is very meaningful.
The MTV is also very touching.

After playing badminton, bowling, and ate with Serene.
She such a sweet and nice girl.
Haha.
Came home, and watched a few minutes of TV.
Then walked into my room and cried.
I also don't know why, don't ask me.
Cried for 1 whole hour.
Then, went to the living room to watch Kung Fu Hustle, to get some laugh.
I think I'm having some mental problem.
Haha.

:P
No worries lah, I'm going to be fine.
At least I'm not thinking about him that much le.

再一次拥有

龚诗嘉 - 再一次拥有

我想念去年的冬天
下着雪的那一夜
你给的温柔
紧握的双手
温暖整个寒冬

失去了曾经的拥有
在你离开以后
带走了笑容
只留下寂寞
忘了幸福是什么

没有你的夜特别的漆黑
只能闭上双眼去感觉
没有我的夜谁在你身边
代替了那个从前

能不能再听一次你说爱我
回到还在你怀里的时候
能不能让我再一次拥有
曾属于我的温柔
能不能让我再一次拥有
曾属于我的温柔

天灰

S.H.E - 天灰

如果你不再出现 我的世界 还有什麼可贵
可惜不够时间 让我们试验 什麼叫永远

想念变成怀念 心动变成心碎
偏偏还会关切 你最後属於谁

我的天空今天有点灰
我的心是个落叶的季节 (的季节)
我不知道如何度过今夜
所有的灯 早已经全都熄灭
Oh~ Ho-oh Wu~

如果你从没出现 我会不会 觉得快乐一些
可惜残忍时间 总要把诺言 一点点摧毁 Ho-oh~

想念变成怀念 心动变成心碎
偏偏还会关切 你最後属於谁

我的天空今天有点灰
我的心是个落叶的季节 (的季节)
我不知道如何度过今夜
所有的灯 早已经全都熄灭 (全都熄灭)

我的天空今天有点灰 (有一点灰)
我的心是个落叶的季节 Yeah-yi-Yeah
我不知道如何度过今夜
所有的灯 早已经全都熄灭 (全都熄灭)

我的天空今天有点灰
我的心是个落叶的季节 Ho-oh
我不知道如何度过今夜
所有的灯 早已经全都熄灭~

right here waiting

Richard Marx - Right Here Waiting

Ocean's apart day after day
And I slowly go insane
I hear your voice on the line
But it doesn't stop the pain

If I see you next to never
How can we say forever

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

I took for granted, all the times
That I thought would last somehow
I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can't get near you now

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me going crazy

Repeat chorus

I wonder how we can survive
This romance
But in the end if I'm with you
I'll take the chance

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me going crazy

Repeat chorus

don't love you no more

Craig David - Don't Love You No More (I'm Sorry)

CHORUS
Rain outside my window pouring down
What now, your gone, my fault, I'm sorry
Feeling like a fool cause I let you down
Now it's, too late, to turn it around
I'm sorry for the tears I made you cry
I guess this time it really is goodbye
You made it clear when you said
I just don't love you no more


is this how you feel about me?

olivia ong

Recently, I've been listening these few songs that I've posted.
haha, all very nice leh.
:P

Anyways, I want to help our ex-damaian here, Olivia Ong,
to advertise her new album --- Precious Stones.
Erm, she's got a sweet voice, yeah.
She's good-looking too.
haha.
>_< [blush blush]
This ablum is mostly songs which can make you move to the dance floor.
haha.
She was from this [not so famous girl band] Mirai.
They were formed around the year 2000.
Mirai was formed actually to target the Japan Music Industry. [but they won't successful]
haha.
I got their first album when I was primary 6. :)
But she hasn't joined then.
She only joined Mirai after one of the member --- Brenda left.
Too bad, didn't buy their second album.
Because their second album comes in the Pink & Blue package.
Two different CDS.
So I didn't buy, was thinking too expensive to get both CDs. :(

If I am not wrong, she was a councillor back in Damai.
haha.
Sounds like I've investigated about her background.
No lah.
Just that I've started to noticed her when I was secondary one.
Then, on the first day of school, I was like, "Woah, who's this pretty girl?"

After she graduated from Damai, she went overseas to study.
While studying in Japan's high school, she worked with producers to make her first solo album --- A Girl Meets Bossanova.
Then after, the second album --- Precious Stones.
All the 12 tracks in this ablum is penned by her.

But if you want to know more about her, as in see her photos, and listen to her songs. You can visit this website www.oliviaong.com
I bet ya don't understand what are they talking about.
Because the words are in Japanese. -____-"

Cool, huh.
Hope that she'll have a successful career in making music.
:)

心动

I know that you liked this song.

Shino 林晓培 - 心动

有多久没见你
以为你在那里
原来就住在我心底
陪伴着我的呼吸

有多远的距离
以为闻不到你的气息
谁知道你背影这么长
回头就看到你

过去让它过去 来不及
从头喜欢你
白云缠绕着蓝天
如果不能够永远走在一起
也至少给我们
怀念的勇气 拥抱的权利
好让你明白
我心动 的痕迹

总是想再见你
还试着打探你消息
原来你就住在我的身体
守护我的回忆

把爱放开

F.I.R - 把爱放开

当你开始追寻你要的自由
放开我们紧握的手
带走我的爱和天空
我不知所措
我以为我会懂
我们的爱 我们的爱

当我独自走到时间的尽头
回忆和我擦身而过
带走你的爱和笑容
我无力承受
最后的一点心痛
我们的爱 我们的爱

把爱放开 把手放开
如果你的心已不在
把爱放开 不再等待
你的温柔是一片空白
把爱放开 把心打开
这次我决定走出回忆重来
就让我彻底地伤
再彻底地醒过来

终于明白 爱已不再
从今以后 再也没有什么能去依赖
我还有什么期待

把爱放开 把手放开
如果你的心已不在
把爱放开 不再等待
你的温柔是一片空白
把爱放开 把心打开
这次我决定走出回忆重来
就让我彻底地伤
再彻底地醒过来

我们的爱

F.I.R - 我们的爱

回忆里想起模糊的小时候
云朵漂浮在蓝蓝的天空
那时候的你说
要和我手牵手
一起走到时间的尽头

从此以后我都不想抬头看
仿佛我的天空失去了颜色
从那一天起
我忘记了呼吸
眼泪啊 永远不再 不再哭泣

我们的爱 过了就不再回来
直到现在 还默默的等待
我们的爱 我明白 以变成你的负担
只是永远 我都放不开
最后的温暖你给的温暖

不要再问你是否爱我
现在我想要自由的天空远
离开这被捆绑的世界
不再寂寞

星语心愿

Cecilia 张柏芝 - 星语心愿

我要控制我自己
不会让谁看见我哭泣
装作漠不关心你不愿想起你
怪自己没有勇气

* 心痛得无法呼吸
找不到你留下的痕迹
(找不到昨天留下的痕迹)
眼睁睁的看着你却无能为力
任你消失在世界的尽头

找不到坚强的理由
再也感觉不到你的温柔
告诉我星空在那头
那里是否有尽头

Repeat *

就向流星许个心颗
让你知道我爱你

爱我别走

张震岳 - 爱我别走

我到了这个时候还是一样
夜里的寂寞容易叫人悲伤
我不敢想的太多
因为我一个人

迎面而来的月光拉长身影
漫无目地的走在冷冷的街
我没有你的消息
因为我在想你

爱我别走 如果你说 你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔

我到了这个时候还是一样
夜里的寂寞容易叫人悲伤
我不敢想的太多
因为我一个人

迎面而来的月光拉长身影
漫无目地的走在冷冷的街
我没有你的消息
因为我在想你

爱我别走 如果你说 你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔

爱我别走 如果你说 你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔

back for good

This song so very nice~~ :P
Erm, I didn't know Robbie William was from this boy band.
But Robbie William didn't sing this song lah.

Take That - Back For Good

I guess now it's time for me to give up
I feel it's time
Got a picture of you beside me
Got your lipstick mark still on your coffee cup, oh yeah

Got a fist of pure emotion
Got a head of shattered dreams
Gotta leave it, gotta leave it all behind now

CHORUS
Whatever I said, whatever I did
I didn't mean it
I just want you back for good
Whenever I'm wrong, just tell me the song
And I'll sing it
You'll be right and understand

Unaware but underlined I figured out this story
No no, it wasn't good, no no
But in a corner of my mind
I celebrated glory
But that was not to be

In the twist of seperation you excelled at being free
Can't you find a little room inside for me

REPEAT CHORUS

And we'll be together
This time is forever
We'll be fighting and forever we will be
So complete in our love
We will never be uncovered again

REPEAT CHORUS TWICE

Oh yeah
I guess now it's time that you came back for good

changes

haha. hey, recently I'm like so free lah.
update every now and then. :P

oh, talking about changes.
ever since I've came back home from OBS camp.
I think I've changed.

Erm, you see. I don't cook.
Never. Not even instant noodle.
You can dare me, haha.
My first time cooking is during the camp. And cook for the whole Tenzing watch.
haha. They're so poor thing. @_@

And I also don't really know how to use the can-opener lah.
Though I did used before but, its kinda like a right-hander thing.
So I gave up.

Last monday, (I meant this week's monday), I was like craving for Campbell's chicken soup [after drinking it during the camp].
I went to buy it after handing in my reflections to Mr. Alan Tan.

Then, I was like doing what I do during the camp lah.
Start using all the can-opener, pot,.... blah blah blah.
So that's when I started my cooking....
Now, I'm able to cook myself a real simple meal.
haha, so proud of myself. +_+ [blush blush]
{thank you for the up-coming applause}

So much about the cooking part.
Now it's about the washing part.

If you ask me to wash my stuff, I will wash.
haha. If you don't ask me to wash, I don't wash de.
haha.
I'm practically damn lazy.
Though I always think washing dishes is like a very dirty job, I still wash it if need to lah.
You see, during the camp, nobody's gonna help you wash you know.

But since my mum asked to me to wash the pot and the plates that I've used for cooking, I just do it lol.
But then I found out that, hey its not that dirty after all.
haha.
Because during the camp, you don't get to bath, you get drenched, you get sweaty, you get sand all over your body.
How worse can you get than all these.

Doing washing at home, even if you feel dirty and everything, you still get to bath you know.
haha.
How dirty can washing be.
haha.

hmm....
yeah. so far that's what I observe about myself.
:P
I'm so proud to be able to go to the OBS camp when I'm sixteen.
haha.
Because if I have gone earlier like when I was secondary 3, I might not be as appreciative as I am right now.
That's my own opinion lah.
Because for a person like me, haha, I don't know, erm, I think I'm always slower than others.
haha.

yeah,
Chun Yan, Jia You! >_<

exclusive sneak preview

muahahaha.
here's the exclusive sneak preview of miss chunzy's stupid close up photos.
:P



me trying hard to act cute.
haha.
its hard to act cute, when you're already cute,
you know.

>_<



I know I look weird in this photo.
haha.













those eyes.
do they captivate you?
muahahaha.














trying hard to act innocent.
but failed to do so. haha.
look more like erm.... dunnoe.










my messy, yet colourful, and nicey
STUDY TABLE.
muahahaha.
wink. wink.











another failure attempt --- tried not to look
so nice in the photo but haiz, what can I do.
>_<











look like I'm going to sleep le.
zzzzzz.









TADA. that's the end of the exclusive sneak preview of Miss Chunzy stupid close-up photos.

You'll have to wait for quite sometime before it is up in the theatres soon.

Till then, bye bye.

muackz. >_< [blush blush]

news

Guys, I have a good news and a bad news.
Which one first?

Bad News k?

The Bad News is --- My Samsung phone is spoilt. So you won't able to contact me, besides calling my house number.
:(


Good News next?

The Good News is --- My phone bill this month shouldn't be rising high.
:P

primary school friends 6C

Haha. Haven't been updating myself recently.
Opps, I mean two months-ly.

Yeah, went to this primary school gathering before I went for the OBS camp.
Everyone looked so --- different. Except for a few of us who always meet up.
Adeline, Nicholas, Yi Xin, Felicia + [Kassyn, Mindy, Kenneth, Wen Hao and Me] = five of us always meet up.

One of the girls became a real beauty --- Felicia. [If I got photo, I'll show it the next time.]
Can't take my eyes off her, man.
I swear I'm gonna be a lesbian in my next relationship. Haha. Puty, don't feel disgusted lah.

Then, this guy friend of mine --- Wen Hao, whom is the only guy best friend back in my primary school days.
He became like soooo mature. Mature as in really arh, his thoughts and everything.
He used to be so noisy back then. I, being the monitress, always scold him everyday.
Now, he post us questions like "So, what do you plan to work as?"
I mean if other people ask me this, I'll be like "Oh, erm, blah blah blah."
But he is really not that kind of person who would ask this kind of questions lah.
Haiz, maybe I think too much.
Opps, did I mention that he has hairless, flawless legs. I swear his legs is damn nice, no scar, no hair, nice tan too. Too bad, he's a guy. Haiz, haha.

Another guy friend of mine, I tell you the last time, I saw him, he was 180cm + 50kg.
Now he's 183cm + 56kg. Not bad arh. Can join the 183 club already. That guy is none other then Mr. --- Kenneth Lim.

Kassyn, not much changes. Seen her for so many times back in Damai le, haha.

Adeline, arh. Shaun's friend back in her secondary school days.
We were talking about Shaun during our conversation.
"So, he still like pink?"
"Yeah."
"Really?" [Disbelief look]
blah blah blah...

I'm not surprise to see her dressing so mature.
Because she has been a person who know how to take care, and dress herself back then.
The kind of hip person.
Not hip-hop arh.

I tell you, the whole gathering thing should be renamed as a eating, or maybe, you can call us the FOODY-GANG lah.

We met up at Somerset MRT, and went to Cineleisure.

After we finished lunch at [what's the place where you get to eat all the pasta?] oh pasta-mania.
One of the guys was like where should we eat later.
I'm like -__________-"

OKay, you have a VERY GOOD disgestive system. Haha.
Eat already, then everything come out at one end. Opps. Yuck.

Nevermind, so the girls decided to take neoprint, while the guys are trying to "run away".
We were like "Hey, let's go and take neoprint."
Initaiil, the guys were like don't want lah. But then, they still decided, "Okay, let's go to the toilet."
Yea, more AI MEI then the girls.

Take finish neoprint. We were like "OKay, where should we go now?"
"Movies?"

Then walked up to the cinema, but stand there for like 30 mins.
But came to no conclusion as to watch what movie.

"Hey, let's just find some place sit down and talk."

Again, we walked down, and out of Cineleisure.
While trying to walk to another place, erm, the outdoor Coffee Club.
We have to cross the road first, while crossing Nicholas was like stucked, or blocked by people who want him to donate. Haha. And he was damn scared.

We walked there, though there were empty seats, but Nicholas say that its too hot outside.
"Okay, we'll go find a air-con place."

So we walked to Takashimaya there. But the Coffee Club there, was way too crowded, with a long queue outside.
Haiz, nevermind. We went down the level, but every else like Coffee Bean or I don't know if its Star Bucks was also crowded.
Okay, so we just stood there and watched the Sesame Street's characters perform.

Finally, we decided, "Okay, let's go back to the Coffee Club upstairs and just queue up k."
Off we go. Guess up, the manager was like saying, its really going to be a very long wait.
Well, we decided to check the small coffee place in the Kinokuniya. Opps too small for the eight of us, because Felicia wasn't there yet.
Okay, nevermind, at least we got to see this Mediacorp Celebrity --- Jacelyn Tay. She is so tall and slim and pretty and...... blah blah blah.

Walk and walk and walk again. We finally came to this junction where we have Breeks' on our left, and a chinese restaurant on our right. But Mindy was like "Let's eat small dragon bun [XIAO LONG BAO]" But me and Adeline was like "Breeks look more like for us, you know."
But still, we walked in awkwardly through the tables in the restaurant with oldies [old people] eating. Erm, weird lah, just weird lol.

FINALLY, SETTLED DOWN. Phew. Ordered very little food. Most importantly, must order small dragon bun, because that's why we came in for.

Okay, we all ate this and that. Then we were waiting for Felicia to arrive. At the same time, we were left with the last piece of red bean paste. So we decided to play this number game.
Everyone will get the chance to decide one number from 1-99. The rest will have to try not to shout that particular number out. If you shout that number, you'll have to forfeit.
Our punishment is to finish up one cup of hot tea at one go. Haha.

So we play and play. But then, Kenneth was like so damn lucky. He didn't get any forfeit at all. When Felicia came, we were like "Felicia, see we're so good. You haven't eat right. Nah, here's the red bean paste with chilli for you."
But she didn't eat lah. We left it for the last game.
Still Kenneth didn't get any forfeit. But it's time for us to go.
So we played the Odd Numbers game.
Haha. And the odd one out was KENNETH. yeah.
Cool huh. By the way, the chilli on the red bean paste was he spread one. Haha.

Before we leave for our next activity, one of the guys was like "What are eating for dinner?"
I really swear, this is no joke. Nothing else to say, except to -_______________-""

Actually, we wanted to go KBOX, but too expensive. So turned out, the guys played pool, while the girls sit at one side and watch. [Boring]

During the pool-playing session, I didn't expect myself to be talking so much to Felicia.
Erm, someone I am friend but not very friend back then, you know, you know?
Yeah, then, she's like very nice to me lah.
Then me, Kassyn and Felicia keep talking and sharing about our lives, while the guys play pool. [Boring]

Phew, Felicia haven't eat yet. So we decided to have a bite. But where should we go?
We walked to the Mc, Long John Silver, blah blah blah, any food store we can find --- all very crowded. So last resort --- Food Court.
OKay, sit down then all went to buy stuffs.
We sat there and talked for quite long. Real nice feeling.
Talking about who liked who last time?, did that tall guy grew taller?, how's he or she now?, blah blah blah...

Then phew, all went back home. :P

OBS Camp 2005

Outward Bound Singapore Camp
(28 November 2005 – 02 December 2005)

Reflections

Initially, we were a group of strangers coming together as a watch, to go through all the exciting activities awaiting us during the up-coming 5 days and 4 nights camp. Gradually, we got to know each other through games, and activities like tent pitching, hiking and kayaking.

The people from Marco Polo watch and Tenzing watch are like a big family during these 5 days. Everyone helped one and other during the tough times, and sharing all the laughers together. It is a very heart-warming. We played games like finding the home tree, and participated in kayaking, and hiking, which really bonded everyone together. These activities have highlighted the importance of unity in achieving group goals.

This camp has given me a unique opportunity to experience the outdoors and explore my limits. Being challenged through a series of height, land and sea activities, I got to know myself, my strengths and weaknesses better. I am afraid of the dark or being alone, but able to work as a team with the other members, also able to lead the group during the sea expenditure are my strengths.

Through this camp I have learnt how to pitch a stable tent on a hard ground, besides tent pitching on the usual soil ground. I have also learnt how to cook. Besides learning such survival skills, the instructors also share with us stories which teaches us some life skills.
Things like being positive despite facing challenges or difficulties, working together as a group, give the best of you; all these will really enrich me as a better person, after coming back from the camp.

I have a lot of my first times during this camp, in spite of having some camping experience before this. My first time cooking, first time tent pitching on a hard ground using rocks to secure the tent, first time using a outdoor toilet, first time carrying such a heavy haversack and go hiking, first time sleeping in a wet tent, first time doing belaying, first time walking in the dark forest without using torchlight, first time kayaking around a island despite having some kayaking experience back in my secondary school days, first time really enjoy coming to a camp.

I have no regrets coming to this OBS camp, although on the first day of the camp I felt like going home. However, it was fun and enjoyable, exciting and adventurous. It is beyond words to describe my feelings after joining this camp. But true enough, it is an experience of a lifetime.


Wong Chun Yan, 1S29

heart-breaking

You're moving on so quickly, leaving me alone.
I'm still standing on the same spot where you left me.

You seem like a emotionless person.
Everything I did to revive this relationship, you just simply say, "I'm not changing my mind this time."

Didn't know you can be so cruel.
Wouldn't even give this relationship one last chance.
If you had, I would have tried my best to do anything you want me to do.
I would do anything for it.

I don't know if I'm stupid or what, trying every single thing, praying for every single miracle to happen every single day.
I pray when I wake up in the morning, I pray before I go to sleep.
Always looking at the cellphone every moment I walk pass it; holding it tightly, waiting for your message to come.
Hoping that you will tell me that all these while, it is just a nightmare, a joke, a prank.
Hoping that you will want me back.

Looking at the box of stuffs you gave me, brings me some energy to live on just one more day.
Guess its a karma, a retribution.
I left you once, now its your turn.

I have a diary that I hope, or I want you to read.
I hope after reading this, you might change your mind.

But Chun Yan, it is time for you to give him up.
He is not coming back anymore, why wouldn't you simply understand.

I'm not good enough for you, is it?
Thinking of me, only remind you of all those sad moments, is it?

I've never really smiled ever since you left.
But I don't think you even noticed it.
After you left, I couldn't do anything.
All I can do everyday is to think of you.

I really couldn't take it during the OBS camp, but luckily I had Zuo Han, Guan Hui, Xiao Yan and Shao Ting around.
Everytime I look at you, I feel like crying.
Guess you don't even know, everytime after tuition, I always don't dare to face you.
Because I'm really afraid that I would just cry non-stop.

I don't expect you to read this, and change your mind.
I just want to tell you how I felt all these while.
Because besides typing these, I don't know what else can I do to let you know.
You always seem so impatient when you are talking to me, or message me.
I didn't know I am such a burden.
So irritating to you.
Sorry.

Tell me, if you are happy with your life now.
With another girl in your mind?
If you are, then I can give myself an excuse to give you up.

I'm telling myself that it doesn't matter if you don't like me anymore, because I am going to give you up day by day.
At least I will try.
I might be waiting for you at the same time, but I know it won't be forever.
If I can't give up, at least I will try not to cry for you anymore.
I hate myself for being so useless, so weak.

Chun Yan, be strong k.