Alan Kuo leh~~~ =D

哦唛嘎！

我忘了说。

哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈

昨天下午回公司录roving。。。
是好的咯。
后来等顺杰代完班， 然后才去庆祝马格列特的生日。

呵呵。。。
有幸。。。

=）

托Ken的福，
我和顺杰跟柯有綸拍照。
超兴奋的。。。
呵呵呵呵呵呵呵呵呵。
合不拢嘴。
=）
这是第二次看到他。。。
呵呵。。。
不过，是第一次面对面耶。
可我不敢看他的脸。
呵呵呵。。。
但还是握了两次的手。

啊！！！！
开心死了。

happy birthday to a lot of people this month.
haha...
=)

yup.
20april.
20april.

before you know.
its 20april liao.
then it would be WOOHOO...
holiday.

i seriously need a break.
considering backpacking.
maybe i'll go alone. ha.
=)

something i always wanted to do.
but~~~ will mama allow ma??
hai.
i need money first.



and congrats to 二哥.
guess what.
he got a vacancy at Oxford University.
DAMN!!!!
haha...
hopefully he get the scholarship..
looking at the results he get, i really pinning high hopes.
=)
then he can do his Masters.
otherwise we have no cash to support him lo...
which he say he wont study if he dun get the funding la.


shunjie ask how i feel having a brother that has such achievements. cuz he told me his side of story and i really cant help laughing.... his mum is one of a kind, man.
i said. happy la.
really leh..
i'm like the average one at home lo.. caught in the middle between my brothers...
but ma treat us all the same... in different ways but the way that we need.
=D
i always wanted the things he have though.
like...
so smart.
go to good schools.
so good in english n chinese.
he can even speak in British accent lo... eew i dun understand a word.
very intellectual lah basically.
damn.
haiya....
life is fair de la...
[trying to convince myself... haha..]


he looked so happy/cheerful. watever =) when we skyped.
obviously, i think he wants it badly too....
please please...
i dun want him to be upset alone while he's overseas.
so...really... let him have the scholarship....
he's kinda scary when he's upset.
okay.
lucky he dun read my blog.
i think.

=D
if only i can have a quarter of his smarty genes in my Mal-functioning brain.

C.M.I.O

you know what.
today's seminar talk on CANNOT MAKE IT ONE.
was interesting to me.
to me.
cuz hahaha... a few were sleeping..
=D

I didnt know that the title was thought by Alfian ->> C.M.I.O
got it?
Chinese Malay Indian Others.
Cannot make all of these ethnic groups / races into ONE.
and.
theatre in Singapore - cannot make it one.
whatever interpretation up to you man...
haha...

ya...
its thought provoking for me..
like some insight into the English. Chinese. Malay theatre.

if there's National Theatre in Singapore. what language would be used?

@#$%^&*

I'M @#$%^&* !!!
FREAKINGOUT....
=/


ONE final REPORT on life course.
ONE film review ESSAY on DAS EXPERIMENT, i've watched this 2 times. damn sick, traumatizing movie. i almost vomit after watching it the 1st time which was exactly one year ago. i stole a plate of (6)curry puffs with Sathish, went to Holland V and eat, chit chat till midnight, make myself very tired and not to think out it, then go back to my dorm and sleep, in order to make myself feel better. haha. lucky, 2nd time was better.
ONE PLAY on Lao Jiu?

ARGH.


all next week.


shit.
shit.
shit.

@#$%^&*


i'M SO DEAD.
final exams coming.
this sem is chuiz to the core.

one essay down liao.. yeah

finally one essay down...
left with one final report, one play, one essay.
before my final exams.
=/

lesson end at 1230pm
straight after 317 tutorial
i went library return my book
then we all went off to SRC.
=)

with Cheng Zhi, Daniel, Dylan, Eric, Isadora.
6 of us...
haha..
my first time playing table tennis...
i think the rest of them got secretly train at home de LOL...
eeyer...
all so pro de...
let's compete in canoeing the next time..
but i think i wanna play badminton and tennis too..
dear clique, lets all play leh...
jio Teddy and Fred.. haha.. then got rackets provided...
=)

the usual Karaoke hang-outers..
Cheng Zhi, Dylan, Isa, Me.
lol.
sang emo songs...
till cry.
a long moment where 3 of us except Isa went emo and cry.
ha..
唱着，唱着。。。
点了首《五月天 - 超人》
then...
T_T
i just felt like letting it out..
A bit ONLY.
a few drops la..
ok no more than 20 drops.
so awkward to cry in front of others.
anyway.
hha.. then after that sing happy songs again..
LOL..
=)













i wanted so badly to hold on to something.



i just.


just one last cry.

‘笑‘娘惹 - the 'Siao' Nyonya

its weird that i had been dreaming of him recently.
i swear i dun have time to think of him.
so i dun understand how come i have those dreams.
they seemed so real that everytime i wake up,
i feel a sense of lost, disappointment,
like reality slapped into your face.
thats bad.




i'm definitely distance-ing myself away from him.
though i dun think he'll realise it.
but i guess it doesnt matter anymore,
since i dun think it ever matters to him.
i think i'll feel better, am feeling better.
就別再為他流淚　別再讓他操控你的傷悲
就算有一點愚昧一點點後悔　也不要太狼狽
他不值得你的淚　把那遺憾丟在大雨的街
你曾在迷失的旅途中盲目追　以後為自己醉
(to van.)




i have to face my reality now.
tourism essay.

thisknee-disney-thisknee-disney??

i'm so hooked up in America's Next Top Model...
been youtube-ing...
i think cycle 11 is the Best!!
the girls are so pretty...
i like the opening the best...
so cool...
like PRETTY~~
hahaha...


yoho...
=)
yesterday's seminar presentation on Emily on the Emerald Hill was i guess quite good... except for the ending part where the class is all sian sian and starting part where the points are kinda irrelevant...
haiz...
i always wanted to say i find him weird...
but really...
hai...
i guess i think we did our best...
ah..
i think they enjoyed eating the kueh too...
=D

my first time wearing Kebaya...
yah...
i was presenting on Peranakan Culture...
=)
cool stuff...
waiting for Zhane to upload our crazy pictures...
=P

then went NUS with my tutor to borrow books for my tourism essay..
ya..
sian..
cuz gotta hand in next wednesday...
give me many miracles...
i have 3 books and notes to read...
gosh...
i'm writing on disney.
interesting but...
keeping my fingers crossed.

i was just walking behind Wendy, Patricia, YiWen....
when i was approaching their big and pretty library...
hahah...
Wendy went like "CHUNYAN!!"
haha...
=D
then she lent me her card to go in...
haha...
so cute...
;)

on a DISNEY ride...
haiz...
i'm on a Disneyfication or rather Disneyization mode till Wednesday 1130am.
then after... let's go KBOX people!!!
can we not play table tennis...?

need to chill before i chiong for the remaining work...
=/
essays, play, exams.

Cannot Make It One

NTU Explorations in the Arts Series


















Cannot Make It One:

A Dialogue on CMIO

Racial Politics and Singapore Theatre



with Chong Tze Chien, Alfian Saat and Kok Heng Leun



Date: Friday, 27th Mar 2009
Time: 1.00 – 2.30 pm
Venue: The Nanyang Playhouse, NIE

The politics of difference is an area of interest for all global citizens, particularly those who live and engage with urban environments. Being one of the busiest crossroads between East and West, South and North, Singapore provides a fascinating point of intersection between several cultures and multiple identities. Many streams run into the same river, but do they ever become one?

Theatre provides a site for exploring this phenomenon and performing the conflicts and challenges that emerge in plural societies. Whilst theatre continues to have several language based streams such as English Language, Chinese Language and Malay Language theatre, they are all part of the Singapore theatre scene. Multilingual productions are still rare, albeit not as uncommon as they once were. So will the streams ever converge and do they need to?

Theatre practitioners Alfian Saat, Chong Tze Chien and Kok Heng Leun talk about their experience and vision for Singapore theatre. As writers and directors whose involvement in theatre has criss-crossed between one company and another, one stream and another, they consider the bridges and the riverbanks of making theatre and thinking theatre in Singapore. For now and for the future. Will they deal with rising sea-levels as well?


ALL ARE WELCOME!!!

炒饭 ^^

哦。 MY 天 啊！~

=D

我第一次煮炒饭耶！！~

自己吃了一大盘。

爸妈也吃了。。。

呵呵。。。

满足满足满足。。。

为了不让那群大男人主义的家伙们在台湾时客死异乡，

还是多需要练习啊~

还是有很多佳肴我要跟妈妈学。。。

呵呵。。。





这几个月胖了。
明天要减肥了。 T_T

sobz

18 March - HS317 Tutorial Presentation
20 March - CDP202 Seminar Presentation
25 March - HS317 Essay
02 April - HS209 Final Report
03 April - CDP202 Play Production
13 April - CDP202 Essay
15 April - HS209 Final Exam
16 April - HS302 Final Exam
17 April - HS217 Final Exam
20 April - HS317 Final Exam

shit.
T_T

思考是好的，思考太多就。。。。

ok.
我最近才发现我常用‘思考’这个字。
呵呵。。。
因为每每我说一次，朋友就会说:“这是你第N次用‘思考’了。”

‘思考’还蛮好用的啊。
可他就会反问我，为什么不用‘想’？

我还真没‘想’过呢。。。






有没有发现？
电视节目很喜欢把男女之间的关系，搬出来讨论。

虽然不同的观点值得拿来探讨，‘思考’。
可是永远也不会有答案的。
答案自己找。
若找不到，那你永远都不会找到。

可是我开始听到很烦了耶。。。
真是的。
说什么，“每个男人都是这样的啊！”之类的话。
有必要吗？

真的没有好男人了吗？

不过，好像还倒是真的耶。
呵呵。。。
可悲。


还是过好自己一个人的生活。
比较好。
何必再去理会另一个人呢？
伤身，伤神。





我在式着，说服我自己。

不是现在

时间仿佛在慢慢的摧毁我，和身边的人。

可不可以停下来？

不是现在，
如果迟早要经历的话，拜托不是现在。

我还没有能力应付这么大的重担。
没有心理准备。
没有办法承受。

让我装无知，度过这几年。
等我可以了，我会扛起它的。
我会的。

迟早的事，
迟一点在来好吗？

现在不是时候。

我没有准备好。

如果现在就来，没剩多少力量的我，会活不过。

T_T

shit.
my face is on omy's video.
die.

why they put inside.??????
为何？

even if only feature 2secs..
i also dun wan AH.....

why they never edit...??
sobz...

为何？？ T_T

哦。
这是在庆功派对时，拍的照片。
可能太累了。
拍得不好看。
顺便把顺杰的脸给遮了。。。
呵呵。。。
paiseh
严格来说是唯一的一张。
因为我还没看到另一张，所有crew和罗志祥一起拍的。
呵呵。。。
唯一见证我参与第一届新加坡E乐大赏的回忆.
竟是把我拍的这么不好看.
咳呀.

Large Glass of Water

found some clips on youtube which features E乐大赏 =)
can go omy.sg too


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P1i06tg_Afk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLw7Th_gAgg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C95wlxZTJpY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3RsM9jagFss

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n12zTNiZQPc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdtOVIwBzUM















还是被你的一句话，无心的话。
给伤了。

看，吧。

有些东西，还是有距离，比较好。

不仅是“远看很美，近看像鬼。”
就。。。
你知道吗？
永远保持一种距离感，
到死你都觉得它是完美的。
差不多是这意思。

就。。
有些失落感。
觉得不真实。
看到了不曾觉得这辈子会有机会接触的。
不懂咧。。
就还好，我正挺着。
还在感觉那落差。
为何？















各位，粉丝们啊。
为何你们会追偶像？
他们也只是人，而已。

恭喜各位，圆满落幕。

很累。。。
筋疲力尽。。
到了某种程度。。。
到我现在睡不着。。。
虽然，我敢说，这经验，这辈子，我会记得。
相信我。
感激不尽，让我有这经验。


呵呵。。。
可能肚子辣辣的吧。。
刚吃了庆功宵夜。。。


今天的E乐大赏算很成功。。。
我觉得啦。。。
表演都很好啊。。。
顺顺的过。。。
搞到我差点昏倒。。。
有种不真实的感觉。
还好，挺得住。
一切结束时，‘哇靠’
拥抱吧各位。。。
来，来，来。
真的今天不知为何一直想讨抱抱。


很想说的：
Erving Goffman's Dramaturgy 懂吗？
Front stage n Back stage 总该知道吧？


为何？
下回分解。













有种感觉，
在看彩虹和星星时，
希望你也看得到。

E乐大赏

http://sgeawards.omy.sg/

哟。。。
就是明天了，各位。。。。

=）

今天赶完assignment
便从学校赶到Marina Floating那。。
去彩排的现场。。。
但什么都没做到咧。。。
呵呵。。。
就听一些歌手彩排。。。
蛮好听的。。。
然后，吃东西，然后，作伯（zuo bo）
呵呵。。。
然后，meet老大，然后，吃东西
呵呵。。。


我要看OLIVIA ONG!!!

就在明天。。
明天啊。。


晚安咯！
=）

random thoughts

i had this thought in the morning while on the MRT...
i decided that i really have to write it down...

like...

i want to believe that there is no next life (for me)
i always feel that living / being alive is a suffering...
dunno leh...
its like everyone is dying since they are born...
day by day closer to death...
jus that you dunno when the date (dead) line is...
haha...
after reading mitch albom's tuesdays with morrie since sec3/4??
ya...
i sort of ask myself everyday...
whether today is THE DAY?
if it is THE DAY? will you regret?
no.
super sadistic right, i know la...
please everybody...
read liao then forget it can...
thanks...

i mean...
some will try to do good deeds so that they can have a good life in their next life...
how you know? that you will be leading a good life in the next life?
its not like you'll be having memories of this life while you live your next life...
why...
have i lived a life before mine??
i wonder...
if there is next life, can i die die die bring along my memories with me..
so that i can be a better person in my presumably existing next life..

where then? does those great people go to?
where is Durkhiem? Marx? Weber? Shakespeare? Einstein?
are they born into another life?

think about it?
would you like to be a female or a male, if you can choose?
a woman's life course is said to be centered around her significant others.
a man's life course is oriented around work.
i rather be a woman then.
if ever i'm married, family will definitely be my priority...work/interest comes second
if lah..
which is not quite possible i think...
[i might consider being a mistress, actually i dont like the idea initially, but im starting to consider it.... hmmmm =D find a sugar daddy then...]
i do feel that people around me... are my guiding lights for directions...
i want to treasure people who are important to me...
least i would feel more like a human being, with emotions, with identities i can identify with other than work.
since our identities are given by others, or through the lens of others.

what is a human being then?
what is your meaning of life?
what is your purpose?

what if?
what if you never find your purpose?
what if?
what if you never find the meaning for living?
what if?

how does it feels like living a life of an ethnic minority?
eg. Indians... in Singapore...
we(Chinese) feels comfortable living here...
because we are the majority...
you know...

give me just one day...
in the life of another...

i should start considering doing FYP on these....
my thesis is....

M - "Don't Trust Men"

haha..
i found this song...
Shinhwa's MinWoo aka M....
i think the lyrics is...
=D
funny...
but like quite true...
ok...
i wont trust men.


M - "Don't Trust Men"

Rap)
Yeah, we got another one right here
Brave Brovas Big M. B.O.M.B.
We gon' do this for the Playuh'z y'all
This one is for Playuh'z
Just wanna make it clear so grab a hottie
Let's party take shots and bounce to this here
Brave Brovas Tone and Big M nah
We ain't goin' no where
So all my sexy ladies where you at?


I don't know how, but I felt affection for you
Somehow you became family
But as I kept on staring at you, you started to annoy me
Because the conscience of my heart kept pricking me

So I let you go
Because I didn't think I loved you that much
I sent you away, I..

If you try leave, I'll hold on to you
But if you come back, I'll feel burdened
This is how men are, I'm a bad man
Don't trust such a cowardly man

You're too good to give to someone else
But you're someone I don't want to keep
I don't want to marry you, but I do want to date you
This is how men are, I'm a bad man
Don't trust such a cowardly man

I really love you, but I always make you sad
I really am a bad man
Don't forgive me

So I let you go
Because I didn't think I loved you that much
I sent you away, I..

If you try leave, I'll hold on to you
But if you come back, I'll feel burdened
This is how men are, I'm a bad man
Don't trust such a cowardly man

You're too good to give to someone else
But you're someone I don't want to keep
I don't want to marry you, but I do want to date you
This is how men are, I'm a bad man
Don't trust such a cowardly man

I don't know me, but I can't stop
I don't know me, but I can't stop
I don't know me, but I can't stop
I don't know me, but you know


Rap)
Cause I'm a bad boy (Yes!)
I'm such a selfish person
If the shorty with the nice body passes by, I automatically
Stare.. that's just me. I'm honest. No fantasy from D.
You know my style right? Even if you say you don't like me, you smile
Ah ha! This is me
Even if you leave me like this, I won't be disappointed (No!)
Our affections were rooted more deeply than our love
Say bye or be mine, you're my one and only Dambi
I'm your 'Badboy' forever and always



Don't come any closer, I'll just feel more apologetic
Leave me alone now, don't love a guy like me


If you try leave, I'll hold on to you
But if you come back, I'll feel burdened
This is how men are, I'm a bad man
Don't trust such a cowardly man

You're too good to give to someone else
But you're someone I don't want to keep
I don't want to marry you, but I do want to date you
This is how men are, I'm a bad man
Don't trust such a cowardly man

yoga-ed on top of ADM

nice???
=)
its taken at the top of ADM...
i always wanted to go there...
cuz i always see ppl going up there...
haha...
finally..
went there yesterday to help my course mate with her FYP...

i just need to sit there and go some YOGA thingy...
then she film it...
phew...
dont need to look into the camera..
haha...
btw it was raining when this was taken.

but nice~~~
to be at the green grassy patch...

>_<

ok.
its kinda big thing going around Spore.
well.
i'm talking bout the NTU incident.

even when Dylan went the public clinic,
and was registering at the counter,
he flashed his NTU matric card,
the receptionist was like "Oh, were you there?"
get it???

ya...

ok...
i shouldnt blog...
what we said in school la...
you know the jokes we make..
very sensitive...
later i kena expelled.

i think got miracle happened.
haha...
=)
weeee~~~
>_<

hai...
why???
i cannot vote???
hai...


anyway...
first time board at Pioneer MRT...
wah nobody de...
shiok... no one to snatch seats...
bet ya never see before Boon Lay MRT from 5pm onwards~~~
squeezy~~~ dao...


ok.
i just saw my future school building.
wah the construction quite fast leh...
think might be able to use it when i year3.
i thought i saw wrongly...
i think the building is black...
hmmm...
what a contrast...
black modern building located behind Chinese Heritage Centre.


i cant wait to go E-乐大赏！！！


i need a miracle.
good luck to me.
tomolo got statistics quiz.
shit.

i'm in love.

=)

with my clique.

i swear.

i have this heart-pumping feeling when i think of them.

like happiness bubbles flowing around...

haha...

really..

sounds so cheeky.

fine. missed your shoulders too. (puke >O<)

it feels safe having all of you.

dont google this. tr33 du3t

i went to watch TREE DUET by spell#7 last night.

at NUS UCC.

it was.. fascinatingly different from all the other theatre plays that i've watched.

it was engaging in the sense that its unpredictable.

it interact with the audience.

i like the staging, setting.

though i didnt understand some parts of the play.

surprisingly, i could still keep up with the show, despite feeling very tired.

it's just unpredictable.

=)

oh i saw cindy too.. in the toilet...
haha...
so that guy who acted was her prof...
okok...
=)

sorry.. i missed YanZhi bday party...
=P

爱情是什么？

爱情是什么？

你的右手提不起手提包，左手会帮忙提。

意思就是 “因为我在你的身边，所以我愿意为你分担辛苦，也因为你的存在，所以我的辛苦，也会有你为我分担。”









我没这么厉害，是小说里头的。 =）
现在读的是藤井树的《B栋11楼》

Happy BDay Teddy.

its really nice to have everyone gathered...
its really nice to have small chats. and as usual joking around with each other...
=)
i cant stop laughing the whole night.
maybe thats why im shagged.

its nostalgic.


HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY TEDDY.
I MEAN TOMOLO.
why did they spell "Taddeus"???


seriously.
how did i got to know teddy?
damn it...
i dont remember...
but somehow i only know the last few dec31st were spent in his house.
ha...
shit...
how i know teddy ah?

i do miss sleeping over at his house.
can we do it again soon?
rent DVD and watch... then
all of us sleeping in his room.
and wake up in the morning and go eat prata????
>_<


i wanna enjoy all the 21st birthday gathering this year.
think it'll take more than my 10fingers can count.


i always enjoy the past midnight HTHT.
LOL.
its...
i dunnoe..
nice~~
haha...
though i was quite shagged.
=P


we're all 21 this year.
time flies.
sooon we are gathered together at wedding ceremony.
i cant wait.
=D
just kidding.


i dont feel like im 20 even.
hai.
we cant stay in secondary school days cant we.


i think the rest of you had the best memories when you were in 1E5, 2E5.
i swear my best memories in sec was when i was in 3E2, 4E2.
=)


when i first met you guys, i was only 15.
most of you met when you were 13.
i had 6 years of good memories with all of you.
i bet its has been a better 8 years for most of you.
i hope we can have more memories together.
just like this.
sit down and drink "awful" coffee...
=D


its nice to have friends that i want to keep for the rest of my life.